I have a special reason for this subject as today is another birthday for me. Each year I become more grateful for each one I get. I don’t know what it is about some of us, especially mothers, but I’m sure I’m not the only one that spent most of my life celebrating everyone else’s birthday and only started celebrating my own, as an individual, in the manner that I most enjoyed, later in life.
I never got the special tie in about the significance of my own birthday. As I have said before, I was struck with health problems earlier than most, in my younger adult years.(I was in my late twenties when the symptoms first showed up) During the years of confusion, before the Dr.s got a handle on what my diagnosis was, there were many exaggerated predictions, about the point of my longevity. If anyone can relate to this, then they know what I’m talking about.
Young adults’ health is never seen as much as being genectic as it is looked at as being lifestyle and stress related. As a result of this frame of mind, years that would have changed my prognosis, went ignored and led to my being physically limited for life.
Nothing in life is ever so dire as those first days of realization, that life as we planned it, is never going to be in our hands, alone. We all believe that bad things happen to other people and certainly not us. It was during this time, then that I really learned to appreciate the real value of another year and found pleasure in just the fact that each year was a gift from above.
To celebrate my birthday was never necessary, as just being alive was a true gift, that was unexpected. It was much later that I realized that one of the Blessings of being alive was to be able to make the day special as well. The thing that I most enjoy over all my other interests, is travel. Although it has never been really verbally acknowledged by me, travel has always been my way to rejuvenate myself from the same old same old. It is very easy to get into a rut where one day looks just like the next.
So now that I REALLY celebrate my birthday I use it to plan my next trip. This year I am proud to say that our youngest daughter has bought her own home, as a single woman, without any help from us. I cannot wait until the weather changes, if it ever does, and my husband and I are able to get through the passes and head to Portland, Oregon and at long last celebrate with her, her accomplishment of hard work and due diligence.
I have no doubt that if I had not been stricken by the reality that life is not our’s to always control and that it can and is limited that I would not have learned to count my Blessings and let the negatives go. For what I lost in life I have gained so much more. My husband and I have celebrated 40 years together. Our marriage has gotten stronger as has our love over the years instead of weaker. Both of our daughters graduated from college with our oldest daughter also getting her master’s degree and they have been self sufficient young women. They are without a doubt, my best friends. We all have an open relationship based on our ability to speak out and resolve issues without pretense. My oldest daughter has the ability to choose to stay home with her children thanks to the support of my very wonderful son-in-law who is also a college graduate. They like my youngest daughter bought their own home with no help from us and have provided us wiith two of the BESTEST ever little grandsons.
I have learned to really celebrate my birthday because it is a special day for all of us to renew our own intentions and to be grateful for the life so many of us take for granted. Wouldn’t it be wonderful though if all of us, before we lost our health, would live each day as it may be our last. When I hear people being bitter as a result of losing their health, my heart goes out to them as we all must grieve that loss when we are faced with it. It is only when we use that as our only goal in life to gain sympathy or to play helpless that health loss has to become a negative. There is always hope and even under the most difficult situations we can still accomplish goals of value, as long as we never give up. We just learn to do things differently from what has been normal in the past.
My wish then for everybody that can deal with the reality that we all will die someday, so why not live everyday as if it is our last day, learn to be positive. It is as easy to look at what is right in our lives as it is to be negative about what is wrong in our lives. If depression stands in the way of your being able to be happy then do both yourself and loved ones a favor and get medical help. Do not wait until you have no choice but to think positive, in order to survive. It really isn’t as bleak as it seems. We would treat everybody in our life better and enjoy every second of the day and do the things we always wanted to do if we knew it was our very last day. In my opinion, that is how birthdays are meant to be spent. I wish you all “adieu” as I go do just that!
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