Family–Faith–Fearlessness–A Tribute!

After accepting Faith, Hope and Charity as our guidelines to live life, then it is my opinion, the best way to live life is with the support of family, the guidance of faith and to accept what comes our way with a fearless objective. If we are Blessed with these we are already on our way towards winning, in my opinion. In my own case it took the hardships of life to know and understand the real value of all. I see my adult children get hit with hardships in their 30′s much more difficult than those that I was hit with and I am in awe of their ability to respond to and with the fearlessness of the success that they evoke.

It took me years of trial and error before I learned what the importance of dealing with life effectively was and they seemed born to it like,” a duck to water.” I could never have made it without the support of my husband and children, prayer and the eventual courage it took to realize that the only real thing to be fearful of was my own lack of response to meet life head on.

I am extremely proud of my Generation X children and tend to support their generation more than my peers because I have seen real courage in my daughters and son-in-law when it comes to their rapid involvement to get involved and find solutions through their own belief system in the hardships that they are to live in their lives.

I come from a generation who turned to alcohol and denial and do not see either happening in my children as they meet their responsibility head-on and I have no doubt that they will all come out the winners as a result of it. As with most things in life the good get buried under a bum rap by the slackers of society and we are slow to praise the successful amongst us.

Today I salute my family and as always feel blessed to have them all in my life. I thank them all for being my, backbone and courage while I battled an unknown. Too often we take the value of family for granted and turn to others when what we really need is already sharing the roof with us.

I cannot speak enough about the value of prayer in my life and how when nothing else appeared to be working I found the simple answers to most of my solutions is found in prayer. I knew I developed a certain amount of fearlessness along life’s path but the real joy is seeing it in the hands of our children as they confront life head-on and deal more effectively with it, than what we did.

Today, Dear Family, I salute YOU and thank you all individually and as a group. You all have shown me a sense of pride,courage, happiness, appreciation, joy, peace and the renewal of my own faith just by your being the people who you all are! I laugh at my own sense of foolishness and importance in my concerns of what would happen to you all if I died. I never worry that you all will do just fine and that has such a rewarding sense of humbling and of closure that all I can say is, Thank God for the Blessings bestowed on me, through you and again, I thank You!

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Where Is The Common Sense?

1. A mother I knew complained that her 3-year-old was obese and couldn’t understand why as she never ate anything. The 3-year-old that should have been off the bottle was drinking 32 bottles of a high sugar drink a day.
2. Parents gave their two sons age 10 and 12 a beer each if they would dance at a barn dance. They are adults and now the parents cannot understand why they are alcoholics.
3. Hostesses and Maitre’ D’s are told to seat people in different sections according to the amount of people coming in. They follow the instructions to the point that people on a cane, a walker, or with a nasal canal for oxygen are taken all the way back rather than seated at the nearest possible seat even though walking is a struggle for them.
4. Women continually date men that have no character as they like the “bad boys” and then complain, “there are no good men left.”
5.Parents complain that their child is doing poorly in school and then send them to their room without supervision and tell them to do their homework. Why don’t they know that the television set and game boys are getting the child’s attention in their rooms over home work?
6. An adult child is not making their car payments on time or are not paying their bills but parents give them a down payment to buy their homes and then are puzzled as to why the bank is foreclosing on the same homes.
7. Parents lie to their kids and tell them “don’t tell Dad or Mom” and then can not understand why their children grow up and lie.
8. Parents pick up meals at fast food drive throughs and say they cannot afford to eat healthy. The same $20.00 bill that they leave at the fast food place to feed the family would have bought an inexpensive roast, potatoes, a bag of carrots and a head of broccoli and fed the family for 3 nights with the original meal and followed by the stews or casseroles that followed.
9. Parents give an excited child one of their valiums, tranqulizers, or sleeping pill and then cannot understand why their child grows up to be a drug addict.
10. parents encourage their children to be popular by giving them everything while teaching them through their own example, the lack of need to take responsibility for their own behavior and allowing them to date at 10 and 12 and then cannot understand why they are dealing with pregnancy at 16. Many of these same parents scream about schools offering both condoms and sex education.

This is such a small list of what is and has gone on in homes across America for years now, and is considered normal by those that live their lives in denial. It hasn’t a thing to do with a mother working at home or out of the home. It hasn’t a thing to do with which Church we attend. It hasn’t a thing to do with which political party we belong to. It hasn’t a thing to do with how much money we have in our purse or our wallet. It hasn’t a thing to do with if couples are married or not married. It has nothing to do with which nationality we belong to.

What it does have to do with is a total lack of common sense or an ability to reason about long-term results. Sadly it is only a drop in the bucket when it comes to what is and what has been going on in the homes across America for generations now. Don’t you think folks that it is time that we all stop and think before we act?

The herd mentality or flock mentality has distroyed our own individual ability to think for ourselves. Children do not have the ability to think for themselves when all they see are parents that never think for themselves or for the safety of their families. The future of our families depend on our ability to stand-alone and to think and reason for ourselves. Let’s get started changing our mind set today. The changes we make will change the future for our children tomorrow in a way that will be a Blessing to us all.

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MY THOUGHT FOR THE DAY! PART lll

If religion is right and a woman’s place on earth is to provide for and to serve the ego and needs of man and to do so cheerfully while giving birth to his offspring, then did God make a mistake or is religion mistaken?

If that would be true then wouldn’t it follow that it was a waste of God’s time to give women both free will and intellect greater than that of men? Both Science and Statistics show that women are the most intelligent of the two genders. Isn’t it blasphemy to suggest that the Dear Lord made a mistake when He made both women and gays the way they are?

Just something to humor ourselves with, I say with tongue in cheek, since some seem to think that the woman’s brain is useless for any purpose other than serving her man and his children. Mother’s in the wild need neither free will or intellect, afterall, to raise their young.

Perhaps it is just another one of those questions without an answer? I’m sure the “Good Old Boys” would have an answer though since Kansas has already voted to eliminate Science’ theory of evolution over Religion’s theory of Creationism from the public school text books in the classrooms. Two other Southern States are currently trying to dummy up their students as well in the field of Science. I believe that is how the true history of why the Civil War was fought in the beginning, was altered as well. Some things never change. Have a joyful but for Heaven’s sake not a progressive day everyone!

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Why Denial Hurts The Innocent

To most of us this should be clear without an explanation being necessary but to others the feeling of denial only protects themselves. When we refuse to close the door to grieving then we leave our love ones in a permanent state of lost as well. Although grieving is a highly personal state in which we need to take a personal line of attack it does matter when we cover it in denial and stay in a permanent state of unawareness to the effect that our grieving has on others.

The longer we choose to stay in the state of denial the longer we make up excuses as to our own lack of activity in the responsible life that we should be living. We use it as an excuse as to why we have been unable to do the things that our loved ones have come to expect of us. Other times people will keep themselves so busy so that they do not have to deal with it and this will usually show up later in a form of ill health or exhaustion.

No one starts out for instance, to make an alcoholic or drug user out of their children and grand children but going into denial will many times do just that, as well. Why we find it so hard to seek professional help for grieving is beyond me. We grieve the loss of our first love,a pet, our jobs, our health, and a loved one and think we need to do it all in silence or make it the problem of a loved one rather than admit we may need professional help.

It is a very vulnerable time of our life and a time more than ever that we need to be aware of our feelings as well as our instincts. Instead too many people become familiar with sympathy and wear it like a comfortable pair of shoes or a badge of honor. Many times family members will even brag about which member had life the worse. All become convinced that to have a rotten life is some kind of strength of character rather than realize that the great majority of families strive to be successful without giving control to the pain that all of us will and do suffer. These families will see success in the amount of sympathy that they can evoke while still denying the legacy that they inherited or passed on to their families as a result of their need to gain sympathy.

Sympathy in the beginning weeks is important to our own well being but the longer we stay in the cloak of it then the weaker it will make our determination to move ahead with our lives. People can get use to having things go wrong to the point that when they do turn around and start going right it becomes almost frightening to them. Getting back to a routine without their loved ones in many cases feels as though they are rejecting the life they once knew.

It is very common to turn to drugs and alcohol at times of trauma and grief and in doing so we prevent grieving from moving forward. Instead of going through the 5 steps necessary to complete the cycle of grief we instead remain caught somewhere in the middle. If it is the anger or depression state that we remain in then there will not be a loved one around us that does not get hurt. Alcohol and drugs are not innocent past times that only hurt us, no matter who we think we are trying to convince. They hurt everyone around us in a much worse way than they will ever hurt ourselves.

Too many people learn to numb themselves with sleeping pills,anti-depressants or alcohol and remain in the permanent state of indifference or numbness and never deal effectively with the pain. This may be necessary if we are of normal mental health and in shock to get over a traumatic situation initially, but it is when people become reliant on the drugs and keep increasing the dosages that they become lost on the path to recovery. Any kind of abuse of both alcohol and prescription and street drugs leaves us in a permanent state of denial and with an unwillingness to deal with the truth or the reality of what we are doing to both ourselves as well as our loved ones.

They instead teach the next generations that the way to deal with trauma is to self medicate so that generations after generations passes the same lesson on to their children. If people knew that drug addicts as well as alcoholics are no different in behavior as they advance than people that inherit psychosis and actually do become psychotic would they then also wish to teach this behavior to their children?

Many drinkers and drug addicts do become psychotic and denial even without drugs and alcohol does lead to delutional thinking and withdrawal from the people in our lives that can help. Unfortunately, those are also the first to be driven away as many people will choose those that offer continual sympathy, excuses, and an opportunity to have a drink over the people that do want to help us heal.

Anytime that we refuse to deal with our own lack of happiness and visit our bitterness instead on others, many people other than ourselves, will pay the ultimate price of our refusal to deal with the reality of our lives. In my lay person estimation, denial, when it becomes permanent, is the ultimate of selfish behavior especially when people do have knowledge that they are lieing to themselves along with everyone else and choose to do so anyway.

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A Black Eye On Italian Justice!

I typically do not comment on many of the books that I read but never have I seen such miscarriage of Justice as what happened in Perugia, Italy last year. I fully recommend that all people who are interested in the pursuit of Justice pick up the book written by Candace Dempsey(Italian/American writer) called “Murder in Italy” and read for yourself the injustice that has taken place there.

If any of us have ever had any doubts of what malicious gossip and lies prosecuted out of a pornographic fantasy of a zealot can do to justice, it is all spelled out in this case. The lies from the tabloid newsprint, that the Judge allowed in, were as equally distressing.

Clearly the prosecution and judge and jury had all the proof they ever needed to find one person and one person only guilty of killing Meredith Kercher of Britain and instead they went after two very innocent young people who are now doing double the prison time that the real killer is doing. We should all also hold the Italian and British press equally as guilty for helping cause such a miscarriage of Justice.

I understand that we have our own shameful trial in the O.j. Simpson trial amongst many other trials where the wealthy get an “out of jail” free card but isn’t it better to error on the side of freedom, than to knowingly put two innocent people behind bars for 25 and 26 years? Both the prosecutor and some jury members slept (literally fell asleep) during the trial. The Prosecutor would be found guilty later of miss use of his office and had been arrested for the same, prior to the conviction of these two young people. It was not connected to this case.

As upset as I am to know that Italian Raeffaele Sollecito and American Seattleite Amanda Knox have been put in jail over a story strictly made up with no proof or evidence to back it by a Prosecutor of the Church persuasion that believes in Satan possessions, you should be equally upset. If this horrid miscarriage of justice is not corrected by the public all over the world now, we then can expect this same miscarriage of justice to visit our own Countries in the near future.

In my opinion, American Courts are finding people more and more guilty in the courts ran by Conservative appointed judges, on nothing more than circumstantial evidence. Some Defense attorneys in States where they can make a choice, will ask a jury instead of a judge, to find the punishment, for a gay person that is found guilty. Why? Because they feel that the jury will mete out a more fair punishment for a gay person than a conservatively appointed judge will. It is not at all, that broad of a leap to think that we can go from there to speculation, gossip, lies, and yellow journalism convicting someone on our own shores.

I am glad to see that Washington State officials, NBC,CNN and Hillary Clinton along with the Free World are aware of this case and actively following it. They can use all the e-mails and letters of support, that we can send, in order to show our support to free these two innocent college kids.

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THE CO-DEPENDENTS And ENABLERS

If you have read my previous posts, entitled ‘THE ENTITLED’ and ‘Excuses Are For 6 Year Olds’ then you have already had an insight into the mind of the co-dependents and the enablers. Most of us feel that the co-dependents and enablers are just normal folks with a heart of gold that feel a need to protect the weaker amongst us. If you do then you are mistaken.

Many times the co-dependents and enablers are protecting their own weaknesses as well. Both are as mentally unstable and as deep into denial as the people they profess to protect. Many times they actually use the person that they profess to be protecting as a disquise to get what they want as well as to carry out thier own personal agendas. It is always a 100% relationship with the co-dependent and enabler. They may be protecting their own feelings of insecurity or unbalance or have a great need to prove another person wrong. Many times they themselves harbor a deeper sense of loathing than the person that they profess to be protecting.

If it is mere confusion on the part of the co-dependent or the enabler and a employee,employer,friend or family member really believes this and are of healthy realization, themselves, they will reach out to question the other side of the issue. I can guarantee you with people in denial, co-dependency and enabling there are always going to be issues.

Many times if people really are interested in knowing the truth they will find that the people who were personally involved with the dispute are never asked or questioned about it. When this happens it tells us, immediately, that the lack of interests in the truth has been deliberately dismissed. The person taking sides is not interested in the truth in the first place. They simply prefer to believe what they are hearing from both the co-dependent as well as the enabler. To find out the truth in this situation becomes a bigger threat to them or their security than accepting the hatched up opinions of the liars.

This is not uncommon at all when an adult child, for instance, feels that they may lose the love of a mother if they disagree with the parent’s need to protect the weakest of her children. Siblings that have always had the lee way to rule the nest often times will form a co-dependency in order to guarantee themselves the position that their parents established, in the family.

Sometimes mothers will ensure themselves that their children form a co-dependency with her against their fathers. It is not unusual at all to see the oldest son/daughter making decisions with their mothers that commonly should be made between husbands and wives. This can also be true in divorce cases where Fathers corrupt the children against their mothers.

These personalities also play a huge role in families where both drug use and alcohol use have been passed down from one generation to the next. Even when parents themselves do not use alcohol to excess or drugs there is a huge amount of denial followed by enabling and co-dependency. What makes today’s drug problem worse that the earlier century is the fact that the drugs are being made in the family homes as versus shipped across the borders.

It is my opinion, that the greatest problem facing America today is the mental health issues of denial,co-depenency, and enabling that is causing children to be used as pons in both the divorced homes as well as when couples stay together in order to compete against each other for their childrens’ love. Many times the children feel that the contest between the couple is more important than they are and it is not uncommon to use drug use as an excuse and a reason for entitlement. Although this is not uncommon behavior and has gone on for generations, I feel it is increasing.

In years past a man’s word really was his honor. To be able to hire people whose only job it is today, to lie,about another politician or company tells me when truth is on a decline to the point these people are being hired and paid large amounts of money to do nothing but come up with creative ways to lie, then we are in a decline. I am not worried about the gay and women issues nearly as much as I am concern about “The Good Old Boys.”

The real grassroots we need to go back to is with families that grow up understanding that lies are not normal behavior and to what extent they damage Democracy. Sadly the way the Churches fight amongst each other as to whose membership will be the first to go to hell if the people are not a member of their churches, and where a woman’s place is, as well as the hate against the gay community, then where can we trust the truth to come from?

My answer, is the same as history shows it has always been, and that is from “WE The People!” We must be clearer than ever on who is a Greedy man as versus a Honorable man and stop it with our vote. It is our own example that will once more save Democracy from self-destructing. I’ve got faith in us all that we can do it again and again if we make it our priority to become aware and alert to what in truth is really going on. Certainly we can see through the many disquises of the right wing movement that lead to devision and misperceptions that are paid for and growing in,” America the Land We Love!” (See:’The Honorable Men’ further back on this blog)

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Why Does The Truth Cause So Much Anger?

Yesterday’s secrets have been homogenized into today’s lies. To bring out the truth today of what has been deliberately omitted from history in an effort to turn yesterday into a time of greater perfection, we as a society have had to down play or simply deny it’s existence. How can the tele-evangelists convince us that there is a greater need than ever to send money to fight against the curse of satan if we know that the sexual morals of women in Society or the drug use today is no different from what it was yesterday or a 100 years ago?

How can families make heroes out of yesterday’s generations if they do not deny the abuse and prejudices that existed then? How can women deny that they are feminists if they are living what yesterday’s struggles produced? How can we as a society be taken back to a time of total injustice to both women and minorities by refusing to let our daughters know and understand what the real truth was? By sanitizing yesterday into some kind of perfection that has never existed we can make heroes out of everything from mom and dad to government to the Churches roles in history.

Recently I read a blog to loosely quote that said, “grandma and mom chose to be homemakers but I was more like my father and chose to work out of the home. I am not a feminist, feminism is dead.” I just shook my head wondering to what extent this person thought choices were ever a part of what women could make when it came to roles that they played. Clearly she did not know that she was living the results of feminism. If at anytime as a woman she ask for and gets a raise then she is acting out feminism even further.

If any of us look at the cartoon depictions of the suffragette all we see are women yielding brooms in bars hitting men over the head with elongated chins and warts. Feminism has never been anything more than making women understand that they had rights and choices and letting women know that they could choose. I promise you grandma and mom were raised believing that a women’s place was in the home period.

It was not a choice. When I moved to the country in 1972 women’s intelligence was still being judged on how well they could cook. If Your grandma or mom are younger than that then perhaps they did have a choice. Feminism has never denied a woman the right to be a home maker if they chose to be one over having a career. They fought so that we could determine our own use of brain, mind and body and believe me if you are making choices of your own over all you are a feminist.

By distorting the truth we can make Satan play a greater role and play on the fears of mankind and offer hope through the churches. We can make black sheep of the family out of the member that chooses to remember the truth so that they can stop the continuation of abuse in the next generations. We can make heroes out of common man to offer hope for the next generation but to bring out the secrets that shamed us yesterday the feeling runs that we are just hateful or spiteful. God help us if our point of doing so is to learn from our mistakes and there fore bring inprovements in the next generations lives.

People like myself that tell the truth that has been omitted from the history books then become known as parent, male, and church bashers. Is there no doubt in your mind that if we would all be made aware of yesterdays dirty little secrets that we could learn from them so that we advance as a Society? It is only through knowledge that we can understand the thinking that was behind the actions that we took and there by advance as a civilization in setting up guidelines to follow.

It saddens me that young women are being taught in home schools that a good woman is a good wife. They are not even being made aware of anything other than how to be a good wife. They are being kept ignorant of choices other than marriage. They are being indoctrinated into being soldiers of Christ and taught in militaristic Jesus camps starting at a very early age. These young girls are being restricted from any knowledge of the outside world.

Both television and computers , if they are in the home at all are being restricted. They are only able to watch shows like, TLC, “19 Kids and counting” that gives the false pretense that a woman that stays at home can shell out kids and afford to live in a large home and travel and do things as the money will be there and they can live happily ever after. Who do you think would be making that show popular if not the families that support the non-use of birth control?

Do you think if the population knew that they had never in their lives paid income taxes because their deductions were so high from having that many children that they never had to pay taxes that the rest of us pay, before the television show, they would be so admired? Do you think if it showed that families like that had to work at an early age to help with family finances that people would think”Oh what wonderful parents”? Do you think that if the show depicted, in the real world these children live on the mercy of others’ hand-me-downs and generosity that the show would be inspiring?

As long as the right-wing conservatives can distort truth and scream hate they can divert the attention of the good people of America, “We The People”, who would not normally tolerate such behavior, from noticing what is really going on. When we realize that states like Kansas have thrown out evolution from their science text books and instead replaced it with creationism and that 2.5 million children are being taught in home schools, shouldn’t that present a larger picture of concern?

Especially knowing that our future relies on the youth of tomorrow and many of these students are being taught by people that either dropped out of highschool or only have a highschool diploma. What do you think the lies being told by the supporters of Sarah Palin, Glen Beck, Rush Limbaughs, or O’Reilly and the Tea Party groups,against the “no good Liberals”, OBama, intelligence and education, is all about? Wasn’t it ignorance that got us into this mess? If the truth, when it is spoken by people, that have no dog in the race or are not receiving a dime to tell the truth, is going to make us mad then don’t we deserve being lied to? We need to understand what role we play in making lies popular by at least being honest to ourselves.

That is what the grassroots organizations is really about. I only point out awareness of it to all of us. I do not bash anyone as it is through truth we shall set ourselves free. With lies being paid for and treated as a commodity today in firms that do nothing but lie, more than ever we must let truth come out in an effort to stop these right wing fanatics that are trying to destroy Democracy as we know it. There are billions of dollars being spent to recruit these efforts and to prevent anyone in office that does not agree with them, from running through the use of intimidation, common sense should tell us that.

I know that I can’t be the only one that has noticed that in every state that it is the right-wing candidate that is coming from behind and winning. This only happened as a rarity until recently, folks. When it becomes a common happening as it is today, then it is time to get suspicious. Never has our vote ever been more important than what it is at this time. We women, once again, need to show the men that we can and will stop the liars, through our vote. No uninformed or paid for man, woman, or minister will ever again, have the right to take that vote from us. Please make it count for something at the polls, our daughter’s and granddaughter’s future depends on it.

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What Do You Gain From Hate?

It has and will always puzzle me as to what people, who hate, think they could possibly have to gain by doing so. I know I can’t stand to be around you so if you are attracting people to you then I can only assume that you live your life in a cess-pool of hate surrounded by the dropouts of humanity.

It is understandable to me only if someone has caused murder of an innocent one in your life and you hate what the person has done as well as the person himself. I was raised to believe by the Catholic Church that we should hate the crime but not hate the person. If anyone can really do that then I wish you good luck. What I really wish for you though is that with time you can learn to forgive as the peace that we all seek will be kept from you until you can do that and you have already suffered more than most people should ever have to bare.

My blog excuses you as you need to heal at your own pace and with all the compassion that the rest of us have to give to you. Although, I myself, am against capital punishment, it is because of your pain that I could never choose to vote to outlaw Capital punishment. People that have suffered to your extent should be the only ones to be able to vote on it.

This is about the people that have not been directly effected in any way by any race or group of people that feel that they have God’s blessing to hate. The people that have no conscience or qualms about using hateful names from the “n” word to “bull dyke”. Are you not aware that generations before you have given of their time and in some cases their life to stop the bigotry and hate that spews from your mouths or do you just get pleasure out of using words that degrade other human beings? Most of us that would not dream of using those words, now that we have become aware of how painful they are to people that must put up with the likes of you, hear you use them and cannot help but see and hear ignorance. Those words brand you much worse than the people that you hate.

I told all the racial jokes and found humor in them in my younger years, and I still feel bad about my days of ignorance, when I did not know they held so much pain for others. I certainly do not excuse myself from doing so. For anyone to say today that they do not know those words hurt, they have to be nothing but a liar, lost touch with reality, or lack compassion and empathy or they deliberately gain some kind of pleasure from hurting others. You may feel like a big man or a fun loving woman in your group but I can promise you that most bosses would not give you a job or keep you on a job if they ever heard the language that you write in your blogs or what comes from your mouth when you socialize. Unless of course, they too hate.

I can’t imagine living my life in or around people that spew forth hate on a regular bases. I would miss so much in life from Joy, to peace of mind, to looking at myself in the mirror, to spending time with people that teach us to be better people, to the rewards that come back to us from loving and being positive. I cannot imagine getting out of bed and not feeling the joy to celebrate the day and sadly,as long as you carry hate in your heart, you will only carry bitterness through out the day.

What have you ever done that causes you to deny yourself so much? Isn’t it time that you love yourself enough so that you can let go of hate and instead embrace love? Neither you or your loved ones nor those of us that have empathy for you, want to see you suffer in the cess pool of hate that you now insist on living in. Be good to yourself today and stop the hate!

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Why Don’t Women Support Women?

It’s been a long held question on my part and one I certainly will never be able to understand. Prosecutors know that if they are prosecuting a case of rape it will be necessary to limit the number of women on the jury as women will be more likely to find the rape victim (the woman) guilty of causing the rape before men will.

Defense attorneys know to limit women on the jury when defending a bantered woman because of the risk that there will be women on the jury that have been bantered themselves and they will show less mercy for the bantered woman they are defending because they feel that it was their fault that they were bantered. Typically women think that they caused their own rapes or set themselves up to be beaten so they then will believe so did the woman on trial do the same.

The only thing that makes any sense to me is that women early in their lives become competitive with each other where as men are more accepting of each other. What I do not understand is when that starts and why. As we get older I understand full well what makes us competitive as there are all kinds of ads for products being sold that infiltrate the brain of women. We are told if we do not use their product then we will not be hip or cool and if we do not have the barbie figure then we are fat and undesirable to men and any number of messages that do weaken the morale of young girls and set them up to feeling inferior to others.

Women are raised believing that as the person that gives birth they are responsible for everything that is wrong if their child functions in less than perfect appearance, popularity,health, and ambition. Professionals on all level of the spectrum will hold mothers at fault for the failure of a child to thrive and praise men for taking a role in child rearing. Churches make it clear that the loss of virginity is not the fault of the boys or men as they are not able to control themselves, but the girl or women have a duty to remain virtuous. Even though abortions are greatly influenced by men, it is the woman’s fault if she goes ahead and gets one, regardless of the threats, coming from men if she does not get the abortion.

Women also know and understand how nasty women can be to each other much earlier than what boys are to boys. It is understandable to me that men would hold a man liable in both rape and bantering as many men will tell us that they know how men think and men can be real dogs when it comes to their view of the woman’s anatomy. So as we get older I understand the back ground that leads to the lack of support of women for women.

I then can go back to what I know about parenting and that is that children do not listen starting at a very early age but they do watch the way parents speak and function. Knowing that, I can only conclude, that girls learn to take fault or blame for everything early on in their lives and to be nasty to other girls because they learn this behavior before they are capable of understanding it, from watching their mothers. If anyone else has another explanation please feel free to comment. Thanks.

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43% Of Baby Boomers Have $10,000.00 Or Less To Retire

Some how this does not surprise me at all. I have only known one other couple of my generation that started in their late twenties or early thirties to save money towards retirement, and then hung onto it instead of giving it to at least one if not both of their children. Our generation, in our favor, got cut off at the knees before anyone knew what happened. We were the first generation to find out about the lack of Company loyalty. Corporations began laying off our generation by the age of 45 to 55.

Our parents were pretty well guaranteed a job for life and then given the “gold watch” at retirement time. Once laid off we were considered too old to be rehired as we were replaceable by both the younger college graduates as well as so much of the factory and office jobs changed to machinery and tech.

There was the saying, “that it takes money to make money,” that caught many of our generation up into a debt they could never crawl out from underneath. The generation before us could put their money in shares and leave it there and then be rewarded by the dividends on retirement. Their pension funds were written in gold and untouchable. Neither was true with our generation.

That having been said, it no more excuses most of our generation than it explains the majority of people that got caught short at retirement time. After World War 2 homes were thrown up overnight with the GI bill making it possible for the majority of our parents to be able to buy homes. Some of our generation was given everything by parents that had come through the Great Depression with their parents. My generation in many cases never learned hardship. So many dropped out to drop acid, make love not war, and disappear across the Canadian border to avoid war.

At some point it was no longer popular to be a drop out and do drugs and they were no longer living in communes. These hippie children joined the work force at a much later date than others, Usually gaining a hand up from Mom and Dad. They then turned around and gave everything they had to their children, as they had learned from their parents, including the drug problem.

So many of my generation spent money like there was no tomorrow either on risky business adventures or in spoiling their children. Most of those children being the Generation X group, with some of them, who still depend on their parents for their livelyhood or to buy their houses or bail them out of trouble Just as their parents did them in many of the cases. Just as our generation, for those of us that earned every dollar we ever made, were called on to support our parents generation, who did not provide for themselves, because they paid adult children’s expenses, until they died. Generation X is now going to be the next generation that will be called on to support the babyboomers.

I see some justice in that when it is one generation after the next that refuses to let their children grow up or their children refuse to grow up, passing on the lack of responsibility. It never has nor will it ever be fair to the families that lived within their means and taught the next generation to do the same.

Statistically over 3 generations every family will have at least two acoholics, one drug addict and one spend beyond their means person in the make-up of an extended family that has refused to force those members into taking responsibility for their own choices. These scenarioes can vary with the number of spenders and drug addicts being variables of the alcoholics but all families have destructive tendencies. Example of that being:the first generation makes the fortune, the second generation holds it together or adds to it,and the third generations loses it all. These family short comings existed long before women left the home to work. Anyone of these problems will bankrupt the older generations as long as they refuse to let the adult child grow up. The person suffering in these families many times are not the alcoholic, drug addict, or out of control spender.

Instead it is the family of the enabler that holds the rest of the family hostage in favor of it’s weaker members. The one that forms the co-dependency that makes it possible for the siblings or parents to all contribute to their manipulation. I also do not know a single family that does not deal in one of these ways with an out of control person in their lives bankrupting the entire family.

What we as a Nation have failed the greatest at addressing is excusing poor behavior at the expense of good behavior. Why then do we expect to elect politicians that will spend money any differently that what has been going on in three generations now or to be free of the weaknesses that strike all of our families. The fact that only 43% of baby boomers will live on the government cuff actually surprises me as from my own experiences I would have thought that number much larger.

The only way that I can see that there is some justice for the responsible family members that deal in cash only, pay their own bills, and force the family member that is draining the family into treatment, or at least acknowledgement of their own poor character is to pass healthcare reform.

To think that the next generations, that do pay their bills, and teach their children to be responsible, are going to be able to withstand yearly raises of 30 to 40 % increases by the insurance Companies who currently have no regulations, is ludicrous. Even if we didn’t already have a 12 trillion dollar deficit. At some point, hopefully when it isn’t too late, Corporations and special interests will be seen as the enemy amongst us when it comes to the cause of corruption that does spread through the government. It is time to recognize the lies and to pass healthcare reform now.

Simply put, it is time to understand that it will be government, not capitalism or religion that will save the middle class. Passing healthcare is the right thing to do. Take courage and stand up by letting your elected officials know it is time to pass healthcare reform, now!

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